Gay parenthood.

I missed this and thank a friend for bringing it to my attention. Ottolenghi – my unrivalled culinary inspiration – reflected for The Guardian recently on his long road to becoming a father. It’s a beautiful and deeply informative piece. Of most interest to me were the unconventional child-rearing arrangements he considered setting up. When he found a lesbian couple that he could envision offering motherhood to his future child, the following possibility unfolded:

We ended up with a very complex document. There was a scenario for the first year, the second year and the following two years. There was a stipulation about primary school and about secondary school. I’d go down to Brighton twice a week; the child would spend every other weekend with us, but only after the age of nine months. Karl and I would be able to take “it” on holiday alone, but only after “it” was two years old.

But what if one couple broke up? What if both couples broke up? What were the rights for future spouses? For future siblings? The contract became the bane of our lives. Our initial chemistry seemed less and less capable of holding everything together. We were quickly turning into a divorcing couple, negotiating their settlement. What time would you bring “it” back on a Saturday night? And why couldn’t I have my child sleep over at six months, anyway?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s